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REVIEW of the AixiASIA 7 vibration modes double cock ring prostate vibrator.

I love doing reviews of adult toys, and I’ve done many! When I was offered the chance from bestvibe.com to look over their product line and choose an item to test and review, I jumped at the chance.

Not knowing what to expect, I looked the classy, clean website over and settled on the extremely reasonably priced item titled, “7 Vibration Modes Double Cock Ring Prostate Vibrator”. Personally I truly don’t think men get enough attention when it comes to toys for them, so I thought that would be the right choice for my partner and I to give a try.

At $30.99USD I didn’t think I would be greedy and go with the higher priced ticket items for my “first time”. This suited my modest needs, and after all was said and done, a discreetly packaged item arrived within the week. Rather fast I thought.

Since Halloween is just around the corner, my favourite time of the year, I thought it would be the ideal post to celebrate All Hallow’s Eve in sexy wacky style. Let me remind you that Wacky Wednesday was created to showcase all things wacky in the world of sex toys, and we know there is a lot. However Wacky Wednesday has also grown to include the “wild and wondrous” of the internet, showcasing creations I find in my travels in cyber land, in case you were wondering.

As a sex toy reviewer, why not? After all it is halloween and people don’t stop fucking just cause they are handing out candy do they? I only hope they are not doing both at the same time!

Anyway………

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Here you have it, another lovely from the garbage bin of old toys gone bad, that somehow find their way mysteriously onto store shelves when responsible, ethical employees have their backs turned!

The “Total Satisfaction” by Mandy Mystery, whoever the fuck she is, a dual stimulator out of Germany. I am assuming from Germany as I read the German which describes it as being able to be used both vaginale und anale for those who love to be stimulated much like you would holding a six pack of beer in the cardboard box.

Speaking of box, the packaging is so faded, dusty and little crunched on the one corner that carries through to back side of the box that reveals an exciting picture, complete with a “magnified” area of her nether regions and a somewhat shitty attempt at German English translation in multiple captions.

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As much as the packaging of this “lovely” item tries to make it look like a worthwhile product with it’s glossy exterior, and quite frankly, beautiful box, the picture smacks you right in the face.

Pipe dream’s Titty Fuck-Her, the masturbator in the shape of tits and a pussy positioned, smack dab, right between them. Can we say somewhat misogynistic with a dash of objectification?

Made of “fanta-flesh” which is actually TPR (Thermo-Plastic-Rubber): billed as the most lifelike material that mimics the look and feel of real human skin, it warms to the touch during use, is waterproof, light weight, super stretchy and soft.

In the box you get a bottle of “moist” lube, cleaner, a bottle revive to bring back to life the fanta flesh, and a bullet with a remote control.

However, I still couldn’t stop laughing at the picture on the box, and couldn’t believe that such a product design actually existed!!! Please don’t tell me a woman came up with this design? So, I let my curiosity get the better of me and had to take a look inside. Curiosity that should’ve killed this cat! LMAO! (more…)

Misogynistic at it’s best! Feature this lovely one that leaves me wondering who the hell comes up with these designs? Ok I get the idea of masturbators, and the crazy array of designs out there, which for the most part I find seriously fun, and humorous, but like I’ve said before many leave me scratching my head in disbelief trying not to formulate an opinion. This one, I have to say, is seriously fucked! I don’t know how else to describe it.

Here is how Sexcitable describes this lovely piece of work; (more…)

Billed as;

Heel, toe, 1-2-3! Kaylani’s Foot Fetish Masturbator is a deliciously kinky toy.

A velveteen pussy in the sole of the petite foot provides an incredibly lifelike sensation, with textured shaft.

Finished with toes with ruby red nails.

Ok WTF!

As a person that revels in the bizarre, there are quite a few things out there I find just stupid and useless, designed, for lack of better terminology, to suck the money out of some of those dumb-assed idiots out there in sex-toy porn land! (more…)

Things get wilder and wilder, and somewhat objectified, but hey, I get it in the world of adult novelties because pretty much anything can be used as a “hole” so why not brand it, and sell it?

Well here you have it, the Twerking Butt from Porn Hubb. It twerks, it warms, it massages, it vibrates, and it activates. It has a multitude of vibration patterns, feels “real,” it’s even programmable with your favourite tablet or mobile phone, and even has 3D glasses for viewing of pre programmed movies for an even more real experience. Be sure to skip on over to the website for a more in-depth look, you’ll be sure to be amazed!

Be forewarned, the manufacturers have recently come out with a warning that it does overheat, and unlike a blowdryer that stays shut off for a period of time while it cools down, the Twerking Butt, is recommended that you turn it off to cool for a period of time. However you can turn it right back on again, because the kill switch, well, THERE IS NO KILL SWITCH! (more…)

Ok I just love the name of this product, sounds like something out one of my favourite films, Barbarella where she has crashed landed on the 16th planet of Tau Ceti.

Not an actual product, but a design that was requested or rather an invitation for a design exhibition submitted by Dominic Wilcox I give you the Orgasmatron 3000.

“This Leather clad washing machine and saddle aims to bring the fun back to housework.

Instructions: After turning the dial to the required setting, press the ‘on’ button and climb into the saddle with your legs at the front of the machine.” (more…)

Well folks, here you have it the SQUILDO! For hard core fans of Tentacle Erotica, as described by Wikipedia;

“A type of pornography most commonly found in Japan which integrates traditional pornography with elements of bestiality and a fantasy, horror, or science-fiction theme. Tentacle rape or shokushu goukan (触手強姦?) is found in some horror or hentai titles, with tentacled creatures (usually fictional monsters) having sexual intercourse with predominantly female characters. Tentacle erotica can be consensual, but frequently contains elements of rape. (more…)

Yes for many of us we have a fixation on aliens and all things other worldly from outer space. We have art, movies, stories fact or fiction, themes, and industrial design out the yin-yang, so it goes without saying that it was just a matter of time that the fixation on things sexual with aliens would rear it’s colourful head.

Depictions in art, in all forms and mediums, furniture, costume, and hot hot erotica. Well now you have it in the form of an egg laying dildo. I am not sure where this lovely one comes from but I have a funny feeling it comes from my favourite freaky assed designers at Bad Dragon, where you’ll find just about anything that tickles your fancy, both inside and out, up and down, and round about. (more…)